San francisco vibrations

april 18, 2023

We left for San Fran on Wednesday afternoon. Took the 1 or the 101 as much as we could — through Santa Barbara, Paso Robles, Carmel and eventually into the city. Part babymooning, part celebrating dear friends, the trip turned out to be exactly what we needed.

 

One last hurrah before baby Ludlow joins us in 8 short weeks — this trip removed us from our routine and forced us to talk about what’s been on our minds lately.

Adding baby to the family was always a part of the plan. But I think we’re both nervous in our own ways and for our own reasons. 

For me, the nerves stem from being a creative  entrepreneur and business owner whilst navigating maternity leave and, well, adding mother to my roles and responsibilities.

Will there be enough of me to go around?

Will I make enough money as an entrepreneur to provide a great life for this babe?

Can I still find space for creativity and passion while being a good mom at the same time?

Will I lose myself into becoming a mother?

What happens if I fail?

You can count on a road trip to provide plenty of time. We spent hours talking through what bb’s name should be, what he’s going to look like, our philosophical wanderings about becoming parents and what parenting means to us. We talked about how the dog will react, about what we still need to buy, and about how much more magical life is about to become. I loved that we had the time and space to talk about our dreams, about our baby and just to be together. 

But honestly, the most helpful part of the trip was our last morning in SF — sitting at a busy coffee bar waiting for our brunch crew to meet us for a farewell breakfast. Sitting at that counter, we both felt the energy of San Francisco. The city was vibrating. Girls were leaving yoga classes from every direction, residents were walking their dogs, people hurried from side to side through the big glass window we parked ourselves in front of.

After a while, Alex and I looked at each other and started into one of my favorite conversations we’ve had as a couple. It was simply about feeling energized from the activity in front of us and how we can recognize it, harness it, bring it home, replicate it, and use it to keep pushing ourselves forward.

This is the conversation I had no idea I needed. The anxiety and tension left my body as we strategized daily routines, motivating tactics, and almost a play-by-play of how we were going to feel this same excitement at home. And that’s what it was — excitement. We were ready to get to work right then and there. We both wanted to be one of those hungry, hurrying people, crossing the streets with purpose, ready to conquer the day.

 

 

Bringing the vibrations home from San Francisco is helping wake up our sleepy Dana Point town in exactly the right ways. For the next 8 weeks, our plan is to practice motivating ourselves and each other to seek that energy, drink it up and have that fuel us through productive days and inspire us to find exciting, fulfilling opportunities in our own backyard. The hope is that these 8 weeks of practicing will translate to a solid routine post-baby. That we’ll crave that energy rather than sink into comfort. 

But who knows — all of this experience has been new and foreign and honestly so unexpected. All we can do is try. And remember all we loved in San Francisco.